On Five Years of Marriage

A young man recently asked me, “Have you heard God audibly speak to you?”

In the exact moment, I may have heard God speak to me once or twice. I have had to look back at certain moments to realize that God might have spoken, but I can tell He led me.

My friend Joe asked me to come with him while he spoke at a young adult retreat seven years ago. I had just got back from representing a college at fairs in Michigan. The night before I flew back to meet Joe, I sat in a Chili’s wondering where my life would head.

If I could sit across from that younger Peter, I would tell say to him the words of Philip Yancey, “Faith means believing in advance what only makes sense in reverse.”

Today, my wife Robyn and I celebrate five years of marriage. Going to that retreat with Joe would change my life. Both of us almost did not go. Perhaps, if we knew all the details, we might have psyched ourselves out. Our story would include two years of long-distance dating, me relocating to Rochester, engagement, marriage, Robyn beginning a private practice, and a baby girl.

We say we want all the details up front in our lives, but often if we knew all that God had for us it could cause us to have more anxiety or even less faith.

In five years of marriage, Robyn and I have striking similarities. We both identify as Type Twos as the Enneagram. We both working in people helping professions — she as a counselor and myself as a pastor. We both secretly love sentimentality.

She and I have differences too. Robyn shines in one on one conversations helping people feel heard. I tend to enjoy groups and have the ability to work the room in multiple discussions. She takes her time and thinks carefully over a decision. I quickly consider the options and move forward. She watches the budget, and I sneak trips to coffee shops.

Growing marriages embody the Gospel. The death and resurrection of Jesus Christ changes our hearts and motivations. No other relationship outside of following Jesus has influenced me than my marriage with Robyn. I see the Gospel in her as she exudes patience, kindness, and grace that comes from Jesus.

Has God audibly spoken to me? Maybe. As I think of the last seven years of knowing Robyn our last five years of marriage, I can see moments where He has led us. I am continually reminded of the words of Philip Yancey, “Faith means believing in advance what only makes sense in reverse.”

Happy Anniversary Robyn!

Photo by Stacy T. Photography.